Dominance
by EndlessStorm
Summary: He could have told someone about this. He could have avoided going to sleep on the morning of the 13th of every month. But he didn't. Because maybe- just maybe- he enjoyed the nightly visits. BB/L.


**A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, L! And happy Halloween to all of you. Here's a little BB/L as your treat, hee~ **

**Warning: This contains _yaoi, _meaning _boy/boy, _and if you don't want to read that, then don't. It is rated _M_, though it's not particularly explicit. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note nor am I making any profit from this.**

**Dominance**

_Tick. Tick. Tick._

There was only the familiar ticking of the wall clock cutting through the room's silence as L crawled into bed. It was a little after three am, and he was getting restless. Even this time in the middle of the night seemed early for him (and the look Light gave him as he announced he was going to sleep proved it), but there was nothing that could keep him from returning to his room. Not on this particular night (morning) of October 13th.

_Always the 13th…_

The detective's eyes remained wide open, staring at the ceiling as a million thoughts raced through his head. Every few seconds, his eyes would flit towards the window, in which streams of moonlight were coming in from. It was locked, and normally any intruder would set off an alarm that immediately alerted Watari, but… this specific intruder had never gotten got before.

_But still, what if?_

It had been three months since his last visit. What if he somehow forgot how to disable the alarms? What if Watari had changed the system, and not informed L of it? He closed his eyes at this thought, trying to calm himself.

_He will show up._

The last two months, L had been handcuffed to Light. There was no possible way for these monthly visits to continue at that time. However he had been aware of L's position, the raven would never know. This was the only thing that kept him determined to believe he would show up tonight; if he knew when L wasn't alone, then he should know when he was.

_Any time now._

When had L become _used _to these visits? The first time, he had been shocked- too shocked to even call for Watari. The second and third time, his visitor had made him unable to do so. After that… he stopped struggling. Sometimes, it was better just to give in. Why fight when you can't win, right?

_Don't act like that's your reason. _

He didn't _enjoy _it… That wasn't possible. What part was there to enjoy? He had no desire to be dominated by a criminal who was presumed to be dead. And it certainly wasn't the thrill of the possibility of being caught, either. It was simply something he must go along with. A part of being L, the world's greatest detective.

_If you don't want it to happen, then tell Watari._

No, no, he couldn't tell Watari… Or anyone else, for that matter. Their minds needed to remain focused on the Kira case, not on L's own personal problems. If it ever got out of hand, he could take care of it himself.

_Out of hand? Who are you kidding? _

The clock continued to tick, the noise starting to get on L's nerves as he counted the seconds. Minutes passed. If he had calculated the number of ticks correctly, it would be sometime around 3:38 am now… Was it possible that he really _didn't _know that L was no longer chained to Light?

_Tick. Tick. Tick. _

_Click._

It was all he could do to suppress a grin as he heard the faint clicking noise- the noise that indicated the alarms being shut off. He counted 42 more ticks of the clock before hearing the window slide open- which, somehow, never failed to surprise him, as it was always locked even without the alarms and would still be locked after his visitor departed.

_If you don't enjoy it, then why are you suddenly so excited? _

The slow, cat-like way that his visitor prowled over to the bed didn't help much either. As much as he told himself that he just wanted to get the inevitable over with, he honestly was just as eager for this as the red-eyed man now crawling on top of him.

_Why is he always on top?_

This was the start of it: the silent dance that took place between the two monthly lovers, rolling each other over and biting and scratching as hands frantically ripped at clothing. It was a fight for dominance, in which neither cared how much noise they made, or who found out about it; there was only one thought on both of their minds.

_I must not submit._

Submission is a form of weakness, and one should never show their weaknesses to someone that could very well use it against them. Even in this sense, one that included the grinding of hot bodies, ones that seemed so right yet so wrong together, appearing to be the dominant one was always vital.

_You know you won't win…_

He never won. Endless amounts of nights they went at it like this, tossing about like animals until one of them finally put a stop to it- that one of them being the red-eyed criminal. But by that time, the pent up frustration seemed to be eating away at their minds, and it no longer mattered to L that he wasn't on top.

_This thing between you two is bittersweet. _

Bittersweet? Yes, one could say that. As much as L protested to himself at a normal time how he didn't enjoy this one bit, an onlooker to their activities would say otherwise. Still, the detective knew that he himself was committing a bit of a crime- being a detective that was not turning in a dangerous criminal when he alone had the chance to.

_How is he even alive…?_

This question haunted his mind more than once. They had been at it like this once a month- always the 13th- every month since L had presumed him to be dead. As he stared up at those ruby-colored eyes, clouded with lust, he wondered how different his life would be without these nights. Most might say that he never gave any sign of emotion, so it wouldn't change anything. But really… This might be the one thing that kept him sane.

_So many built-up emotions… A way to let them out…_

He stifled a cry as the other boy thrust into him, dry. You'd think, after a while, he would get used to the excruciating pain that was sure to come.

_Some might classify this as rape._

Of course, it couldn't be considered 'rape' as L started to arch his back, meeting the other man's thrusts, his hands tangling in the dark locks so like his own. He forgot himself in their lust, not caring about the Kira case or that this was against his morals; the only thing that mattered was _this _and _now _and _B. _

_That was the name that always bothered him the most._

It wasn't until after they had both come down from their high that the visitor leaned down and placed a chaste kiss on the detective's lips. L stiffened, not relaxing one bit as the other buried his face in the crook of his neck, seeming to inhale his scent. He pulled back, quickly throwing on his clothes.

_Until next month, then. _

But, instead of turning and heading back to the window as usual, he paused, cupping L's face in his hand. "Take care, my Lawli," he whispered. "You don't have very much time left." He gave a sad-looking smile, then darted towards the window. L shivered, though he wasn't sure if it was at the sound of his voice, or the message. Very few times had words been exchanged between them after their nights together.

_Why do you say that like you'll never be back? _


End file.
